To Maura (Spike) Please Don’t Contact Me Again.

This goes out to Maura (Spike)  I like using both names.  Anyway please do not contact me again.  You’ve made it quite clear that you don’t care much for me.  Remember you were the one that contacted me, I’ve tried but I’m struggling bad, when I needed support all you would do is be judgemental which I don’t need.  I beat myself up don’t need you to add to my pain.  I’m real glad that you got out of here.  If I had the family support that you had I would do the same trust me I would.  With little support or help the best I can do is learn a trade then God willing join the Peace Corps for as long as they let me.  Usually its a 2-3 year commitment, I will re-up for longer if I can, there is clearly nothing here for me & I both need to help some impoverished village than to put up with the intolerance & bigotry here in Seattle! 

It was never necessary to reply I just didn’t want nor need to hear from you. Then it was so long!  Judge me any way you want just don’t relay that to me.  I receive enough hate as it is & lack of support.  If you want to do anything why not be compassionate and just PRAY for me instead of knocking me down. 

That is all.  Good luck I’m real glad you have a life with friends you can do things with.  Your lucky to have the siblings you do.  Very few do.



Published by: The Lonely Shepard

Me: I grew up in an extremely abusive & disadvantaged family environment were both parents were really immature & their relationship messy! I was abducted by my Father at age 8 abused physically, mentally, degraded by his 2nd Wife, and I didn't see my Mother again until 4 years later, I had to risk my neck + my life to run off to seek help with the local police & this was way before there was any such laws on the books for child abuse. Think on that awhile. Had learning disabilities all throughout school by the time I graduated I learned nothing, was prepared for nothing out in the World. Think on that. Joined the United States Army right out of High School only reason I did join was that at the time there was an Army recruiter right on the High School campus & he took an interest in me. So I joined. I was really in over my head. But what else could I do? I lived with a single Mom who was emotionally unstable & I had ZERO support from anyone including the school staff + administrators. The military was hard & degrading to me as a woman but I got out with an honorable discharge. More about me: A series of dead end jobs, my mind was totally a mess after I got out of the Army, still had no support not even from the Veterans admin. My journey has been a total nightmare of: trying to find out about myself, learning about myself, how to live as an adult, all with no help. Now after long , and intensive filled journey I'm trying to get back on track with my life I want to go to school with the hope of one day attending University. I don't wish my journey on anyone. No one gave me guidance: as a child as a teen as a young adult I was all on my own! and it was real lonely , isolating, extremely frightening. Family? don't really have any. Now remember everyone I'm African American & I receive little to no respect I don't even warrant a speeding car that will slow down. "The person who sang the National Anthem sang the last note so high that no could reach it! That was intentional!" Belize from Tony Kushners play Angels In America. If you've read this far I will leave my email in case you want to leave me a msg. Those that are rude will get deleted immediately. Contact:

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