Gauntlet

I’m about to get ready to head out to a Church for a Community meal.  Yes, its kind of that bad I want to save what little money I have left on my debit card all 100 dollars of it until payday to swallow my pride.

But it has just occurred to me that Life is so much like walking down a gauntlet of people who constantly punch,kick, or just knock you on your ass over & over again!  Some make it out of it to find that things are getting better, some don’t, or in my case everyone it seems I’m still walking the gauntlet of some of the most malicious, cruel people that I’ve ever encountered in my Life.  

I forgot to mention as part of that gauntlet the folks who are indifferent & just don’t give a damn about you.  That I could take.  Its the ones who are deliberately cruel the ones that are pure evil who call you horrific names just to degrade & even humiliate you.  This has happened to me so many times all throughout my life & especially in my adulthood that I’m like a soldier with his leg shot off, only to be hobbling along barely walking.

Well that’s it for now from the Lone Ranger’s insight column blog.

Stay tuned for more.

Cause I’m signing off.

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Published by: The Lonely Shepard

Me: I grew up in an extremely abusive & disadvantaged family environment were both parents were really immature & their relationship messy! I was abducted by my Father at age 8 abused physically, mentally, degraded by his 2nd Wife, and I didn't see my Mother again until 4 years later, I had to risk my neck + my life to run off to seek help with the local police & this was way before there was any such laws on the books for child abuse. Think on that awhile. Had learning disabilities all throughout school by the time I graduated I learned nothing, was prepared for nothing out in the World. Think on that. Joined the United States Army right out of High School only reason I did join was that at the time there was an Army recruiter right on the High School campus & he took an interest in me. So I joined. I was really in over my head. But what else could I do? I lived with a single Mom who was emotionally unstable & I had ZERO support from anyone including the school staff + administrators. The military was hard & degrading to me as a woman but I got out with an honorable discharge. More about me: A series of dead end jobs, my mind was totally a mess after I got out of the Army, still had no support not even from the Veterans admin. My journey has been a total nightmare of: trying to find out about myself, learning about myself, how to live as an adult, all with no help. Now after long , and intensive filled journey I'm trying to get back on track with my life I want to go to school with the hope of one day attending University. I don't wish my journey on anyone. No one gave me guidance: as a child as a teen as a young adult I was all on my own! and it was real lonely , isolating, extremely frightening. Family? don't really have any. Now remember everyone I'm African American & I receive little to no respect I don't even warrant a speeding car that will slow down. "The person who sang the National Anthem sang the last note so high that no could reach it! That was intentional!" Belize from Tony Kushners play Angels In America. If you've read this far I will leave my email in case you want to leave me a msg. Those that are rude will get deleted immediately. Contact: Yogibeara425@hushmail.com

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