Young Men Are Plain Psycho

Young men are psycho.

Coming back from my appointment at a school I’ll be attending I had to take my 2nd bus.  When oh when is this tired town going to get a light rail system going all over town? 

I had to cross the street to head towards the 2nd bus back to head home.  Upon walking I notice a young White guy with a shaved head.  I immediately kept my distance.  My reason?  Except for my African American Brothers white guys who usually go with the shaved head are usually real mean & aggressive.  I was able to figure this out within seconds & kept my distance.  Somehow something was wrong & I was right, because once I stopped some 5 feet away the guy got real aggressive a real powder keg.  I’ve seen dangerous & bizarre stuff but this one really scared me.  Right away I pulled  out my pepper spray the kind that corrections guards use, I know were to order my arsenal.  Since I was nearly stabbed 3 years ago, today I’m better prepared & prepared to hurt when someone threatens me.

This guy was psycho.  First kicking the shelter, then swearing, then kicking the bus shelter.  I was nervous I kept me eye on him then I kept moving farther away.   After a few moments I inched my way closer within a few feet of the bus shelter casually observing this angry young man.   I’ve been angry but this man terrified me.  Bipolar would’ve been my guess.

So I’m standing on the cement curb bordering the parking lot & the dirt landscape that had a few bushes planted, I’m watching to see what will happen, I’m not real sure if this clown has any weapons because folks Seattle has had a lot of shootings.   I like to be prepared & stay prepared for anything.  Our World is spiraling downward for the worst.  That’s not pessimism that’s the truth.  Do your research.

The angry guy is at this point screaming at an attractive young woman who is toothpick thin.  Not just slender or skinny but anorexic looking.  Her legs just didn’t seem to have that healthy build.  Her calfs were non existent.  She was small.   The guy was screaming vulgar insults that all of us women hate.  You know below the belt female insults.  I’ve been called this same thing.

I was a few feet away standing on the curb on the parking lot, when I felt an involuntary shudder coarse through my body.   I was in complete emotional shutdown mode but feeling extremely disgusted!  I grew up as a child watching my Mother go thorough the exact same thing with a beating included.  I still remember the black eye Mom would have, wearing large dark glasses regularly.

I still carry that pain.   As I stood there on the curb on a rare sunny day out in Renton I calmly said as if someone else had invaded my body this:  “You shouldn’t talk to ladies like that”   It’s what came out of my mouth before I could think of it.  It just came.  I feel that it was a force greater than myself that brought me to say that.   Usually I am known to fly off the handle especially when I see another woman disrespected.

Today, I only felt like sobbing over that disgusting exchange but rather than sobbing I immediately shut down crying on the inside because the display I witnessed really broke my heart!   I felt my heart break into a thousand pieces.   Perhaps there might be a poem in all of this.  However, tonight I’m in no poetic mood tonight.

After I said those words to the aggressive guy, he had been sitting down.  He varied his routine from sitting to standing to ranting back to sitting again.   But at this moment the aggressive guy was sitting down on the bench then once I said that statement all he did was turn his head sort of in a profile, I guess to catch sight of me.  

He didn’t say anything to me.  I was off course a few feet away from where he was sitting, with my hand behind my back holding onto my can of OC pepper spray….industrial strength I don’t play around with my arsenal its my preferred weapon of choice out on the street.   I keep a weapon at home in case of home invasion.  Haven’t had to use it so far.

The young lady on the receiving end of the guys vulgar tirade was as calm as a cucumber.  She made me proud & I didn’t even know her.  The young woman, real attractive complete with a big handbag turned to me to say “Oh He is just ignorant”.   Then she turned around to lean up against the bus stop sign as if she went through this kind of thing everyday.  The young woman was such a little waif of a woman she looked like she barely weighed 90 pounds.   If the guy would have attacked her I wouldn’t have hesitated to spray him.

However, my only concern was what he might do next.  So I kept my distance first standing near some parked cars in case this guy had a lethal weapon.   Everyone Seattle has a bad rash of shootings, these days it really doesn’t take much for a person to shoot.   Seattle has had major media coverage on its shootings too.   Café Racer, anything in Rainier Valley, even Capitol Hill a place I used to hang out all the time. 

The crazy aggressive guy was hollering, then he stomped up the street like an angry toddler to the corner of the intersection, then the guy came back,  I then went farther away from the shelter over to a donation bin on the lot …just in case.  

If you were to look at this, it was pretty comical.  The guy did this repeatedly until finally thank the LORD the bus arrived.   But prior to the arrival of the bus?   The young man took a full cola can & threw it with all his might across the street!  I thought to myself that if this young man could only redirect his energy, he would make one heck of a football quarterback.

I made sure that he didn’t ride the same bus as I did, otherwise I would have caught the next bus & gotten some snacks at Walgreens.   

I was starving once again I neglected to eat.

I must say everyone that this was the most bizzare event ever!  And I’ve rode the busses alone encountering some of the most crazy,creepy, angry, people ever.  Which I may blog to you later on them, there are a few.

Too bad this young man didn’t go & just smoke a joint.   He’d a been a little bit more bearable & a lot less scary.

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Published by: The Lonely Shepard

Me: I grew up in an extremely abusive & disadvantaged family environment were both parents were really immature & their relationship messy! I was abducted by my Father at age 8 abused physically, mentally, degraded by his 2nd Wife, and I didn't see my Mother again until 4 years later, I had to risk my neck + my life to run off to seek help with the local police & this was way before there was any such laws on the books for child abuse. Think on that awhile. Had learning disabilities all throughout school by the time I graduated I learned nothing, was prepared for nothing out in the World. Think on that. Joined the United States Army right out of High School only reason I did join was that at the time there was an Army recruiter right on the High School campus & he took an interest in me. So I joined. I was really in over my head. But what else could I do? I lived with a single Mom who was emotionally unstable & I had ZERO support from anyone including the school staff + administrators. The military was hard & degrading to me as a woman but I got out with an honorable discharge. More about me: A series of dead end jobs, my mind was totally a mess after I got out of the Army, still had no support not even from the Veterans admin. My journey has been a total nightmare of: trying to find out about myself, learning about myself, how to live as an adult, all with no help. Now after long , and intensive filled journey I'm trying to get back on track with my life I want to go to school with the hope of one day attending University. I don't wish my journey on anyone. No one gave me guidance: as a child as a teen as a young adult I was all on my own! and it was real lonely , isolating, extremely frightening. Family? don't really have any. Now remember everyone I'm African American & I receive little to no respect I don't even warrant a speeding car that will slow down. "The person who sang the National Anthem sang the last note so high that no could reach it! That was intentional!" Belize from Tony Kushners play Angels In America. If you've read this far I will leave my email in case you want to leave me a msg. Those that are rude will get deleted immediately. Contact: Yogibeara425@hushmail.com

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