The Problem I Had With The Public School System Or Public School Sucks PT 2

This blog is a continuation of the first blog I wrote called Public School…sucks.  You can read it on my blog archives.

If you have the time you’ll need to search for it, as I’ve wrote well over 200 blogs since April of this year.  I mean if you want to & have some time.

Tonight I’m home grateful I have my home internet.  It’s the only thing that keeps me company living alone as I don’t have much.

Anyway I’m home watching a nature show feeling alright, however one of the issues that seem to surface for me which I’m glad to say isn’t the abuse issues…..is the issue I have of my experience with both the Los Angeles Unified School District which I attended from K- some of my 7th grade year at the Middle school in L.A. as I was reunited with my Mother after a long 4 year separation only then some 4 weeks later to flee to Washington State to escape Mom’s ex psycho Husband.  Real bad.

During all of my years of attending various public schools I seem to fall further behind yet I kept being promoted up a grade not learning nearly enough in the previous one.   Basically public school is no better than a warehouse where it seemed that the Teachers no more cared about what students learned than someone watching the paint dry.   It’s true.

I had such trouble with school.  In addition I had trauma both suffered at the hands of school teacher & so called Parents who were supposed to teach me how to develop into a confidant young girl who would later grow into a confidant young woman.  Well it didn’t happen yes my Parents sucked.  You may not agree with me when I say to a certain extent…okay all of the extent I do blame them because in my opinion you don’t need to be terribly educated just BE THERE & encourage the child saying to them that they can be anything that they want to be whether it be a Doctor, lawyer, or whatever.   If the Parent can’t help with children’s education get someone who will.

Hey, its that simple.  Parents take my advice, children need you!  They won’t make it otherwise.  I speak from years of experience.

When I attended school I basically occupied a desk everyday nothing more.  The Teachers would drone on about whatever lesson they were teaching for the day, and I just didn’t understand anything that they said.  Teachers might as well have been speaking in Russian for all that it matter. 

Education is supposed to prepare you for the future….right?   Only prepared me for a lifetime of pain, humiliation, poor decisions, poor self esteem…oh & those horrible jobs with those ignorant bosses who disrespected me at every single turn no matter how nice, positive I was.

Worrying about my Mother who I was forcibly separated from by the courts thanks to the workings of a Father seeking revenge & his scheming remarried Wife.   I learned at an early age just how unfair life can be.  I nearly lost my Mother to suicide. 

I felt so dead inside I just needed someone, anyone who could reach me, but that just didn’t happen basically I was just a faceless kid.  I had no one to reach out to.   At 9 years old I just didn’t know how to go on. 

Teachers I feel need to do more to help out children.   I realize that Teachers don’t make very much especially in a school with a high rate of African American & Hispanic but hey, we matter too & aren’t our futures worth it?  Where is the help for us?  Children of color deserve the same quality education & whatever help just like the affluent children.   We can’t do for ourselves.  I sure couldn’t.

The Public school system is plain awful!  The Presidents of past & present sure don’t give a damn.   Not much was thought of me when I was in school.  I was called stupid, ignored, I remember that classes were so overcrowded that the Teachers had paired up the students in class the one I was in to tutor the other kids who had trouble with reading.   Can you believe it?  Here I was struggling as it was with my own academics anemic as it was, and I’m supposed to do the Teachers job of insuring that my classmates can read.  But that’s what happened.

We kids were paired up with another kid who had trouble with reading.

Reading was the one thing I did do well but the last thing I wanted to do was help another kid learn how to read, I just wasn’t equipped to do that, it was the Teachers job to figure that out.  Plus the kid I was paired up with was a complete idiot who had no interest in learning to read as he was tormenting & abusing me.  Hated that kid.   This school was Wilshire Crest in Los Angeles.  For Parents who read this don’t send your kids there.   I’ve heard that it hasn’t changed all that much.   My half sister was taken out of that school by her Mother my Fathers 5th Wife & placed her into a private school.  She is now finishing up Med school.  I’m happy for her that she got out of that Dickensian school of hard knocks & minimal to no education.   Wow!

I also wasn’t getting nearly enough to eat at home.  My Fathers 2nd Wife kept me fed with celery sticks, apple butter sandwiches & water Campbell soup.  I would eat the food but was always really hungry.  I survived by scavenging in the schools garbage usually the top part eating a half eaten sandwich.   Making learning in school nearly impossible because I was always hungry….breakfast = minimal, lunch = minimal, dinner =  barely enough to keep my stomach from growling.  And we weren’t poor either.   It was an abuse tactic. 

One positive about me losing so much weight that I was too weak most times was that the toughest bullies on the school yard would take pity on me & never bother me.   One told me that I wasn’t worth it I was too skinny, and told me to eat something before he stalked off to torment his next victim.   Well I was lucky.

With school I continued to fall behind especially in Math that the Teachers solution was to have me work out of a math book that was from a previous grade.  For example when I was in 3rd grade I was told to work out of a 2nd grade book.  I don’t remember if that fixed the problem but I was humiliated & no extra help was provided, which was what I needed.   Everyone has potential to be an excellent student.  I feel that too many children poor & minority are written off as losers in the school system.  That goes for the poor White children as well.

What I’ve learned is that this is done intentionally by the powerful people who have lots of money.  Read Savage Inequalities by Jonathon Kozol.  His book is about the poorer schools in the Bronx, but its a problem all over the U.S.   Public schools underserve the children that need it the most.   Voting doesn’t seem to put a fire under the Public school system’s ass.    Too much bureaucratic bullshit. 

That’s why Parents need to be 100% proactive in their children’s education.  Rich, poor, doesn’t matter don’t let money deter you Parents from insuring your children get that quality education.   My Father didn’t do squat, step Mom didn’t care, and Mom didn’t know cause she wasn’t allowed to see me.  I was screwed!

I had paid a horrible cost.   Most of my adult life gone, and I’m trying to get into College starting all over again from the very beginning.

Adult Basic Education were I must learn grammar even though I am a good writer ( I scored low on a college Compass test)  Math ( at the time of my high school graduation I was barely at a sixth grade level)  Which I need to take so I can get my entrance test scores up. 

I must take ABE totally separate from any Community College class because its way cheaper.   Once I complete the ABE courses I must re take the Compass test to get into school so I can hopefully be placed into pre-algebra, Biology, English 101.   So I have to re-work at getting back to a high school level what I should have had when I donned that stupid cap & gown. 

My diploma isn’t worth the paper its printed on.  And 4 years after I graduated H.S. I ripped it up. 

I’ve carried this issue around for years.  I can only begin to repair the damage now, but I must tell you this has caused me such pain, torment, and psychologically left me confused as to my own intelligence.

Parents take heed what goes on with your kids in the classroom.  Neglect is a dangerous thing for the kids attending school. 

Education, absolutely priceless.

 

Remember that a mind is a terrible thing to waste

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Published by: The Lonely Shepard

Me: I grew up in an extremely abusive & disadvantaged family environment were both parents were really immature & their relationship messy! I was abducted by my Father at age 8 abused physically, mentally, degraded by his 2nd Wife, and I didn't see my Mother again until 4 years later, I had to risk my neck + my life to run off to seek help with the local police & this was way before there was any such laws on the books for child abuse. Think on that awhile. Had learning disabilities all throughout school by the time I graduated I learned nothing, was prepared for nothing out in the World. Think on that. Joined the United States Army right out of High School only reason I did join was that at the time there was an Army recruiter right on the High School campus & he took an interest in me. So I joined. I was really in over my head. But what else could I do? I lived with a single Mom who was emotionally unstable & I had ZERO support from anyone including the school staff + administrators. The military was hard & degrading to me as a woman but I got out with an honorable discharge. More about me: A series of dead end jobs, my mind was totally a mess after I got out of the Army, still had no support not even from the Veterans admin. My journey has been a total nightmare of: trying to find out about myself, learning about myself, how to live as an adult, all with no help. Now after long , and intensive filled journey I'm trying to get back on track with my life I want to go to school with the hope of one day attending University. I don't wish my journey on anyone. No one gave me guidance: as a child as a teen as a young adult I was all on my own! and it was real lonely , isolating, extremely frightening. Family? don't really have any. Now remember everyone I'm African American & I receive little to no respect I don't even warrant a speeding car that will slow down. "The person who sang the National Anthem sang the last note so high that no could reach it! That was intentional!" Belize from Tony Kushners play Angels In America.

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