This World of ours in the 21st Century is more confusing than at any other time in my life. For nearly my whole life to this very day I just don’t he have any idea where I FIT INTO the scheme of things. I never married (Praise be to God) Never had children (Are you kidding I barely survived being a kid myself) and so now I’m at a time in my life trying to figure things out. I never received any support around my development either, everyone who I ever knew were either impatient, hostile, or downright uncaring about even listening to me. All I ever got was HOW THEY FELT. Never have I ever had someone who would just LISTEN to me, and how I felt. It’s left me real wounded inside.
I withdraw further into myself because the trust in other PEOPLE has completely eroded into NOTHING! I seek refuge in some books to read or I watch old TV westerns. It’s all I like. As I’ve said in my last blog I could care less about how the Seattle Seahawks are doing, because I’m more concerned WITH HOW I’M DOING! Because for me its really tough going all across the board. For most of my life I’ve crossed paths or dealt with the most unstable of people & that’s including my immediate family. It’s most sad everyone.
Often it feels like I walk around in the World & the other People have their heads encased inside of a fishbowl, oblivious to every & anything else going on in the World. Feels like walking around in the Twilight Zone.
Welcome to the Twilight Zone. This is not living. It’s a living Hell!