Tips On Surviving Your Stay At Women’s Homeless Shelter

If you find yourself (God forbid) having to stay at a women’s shelter here are some survival tips that I hope will help.

Here goes:

  1. If your between say 16-20 go to an age appropriate shelter please, a women’s shelter isn’t the place for you, and a lot of us who are older really don’t have time to deal with the immaturity and you all have the immaturity.   If you find yourself in the company of the older women at a shelter then for God’s sake please don’t look to us to be your Mother or a guidance counselor we just do NOT have time . There are agencies you can go to  for your particular age group that can help with whatever issues your dealing with youngsters.  Look them up on the Google.
  2. Older women.   Don’t ever, ever become friends with ANY  of the shelter residents it’s just not a good idea.
  3. See #2 please.   If the shelter has you wake up at 6AM which is the standard time for shelter residents, then wake up one hour prior so you can get yourself ready, get your stuff together then get out before any of the residents have a chance to wake up.   This way you avoid any contact with toxic residents.  Remember this treat ALL shelter residents like the plague.  More often than not this environment is so, dysfunctional & full of DRAMA!
  4. Usually, there is a curfew.   Return as close to the curfew as possible.
  5. When you return for the shelter curfew take care to get yourself to bed.
  6. Avoid any residents when possible, if you have to talk with shelter staff then do so explaining to them that your there to get your housing & NOT to socialize with residents.   They should understand hopefully.
  7. Try to do your OWN laundry off the premises of the shelter.  Either go to a laundromat or a friend who has a washer & dryer.   If possible do your laundry piecemeal if you don’t have a car.   Try to squeeze as much as you can into a backpack.
  8. Don’t rely on the shelter case managers.
  9. Research resources on where to get what you need go to Google: type in homeless resources ( add your town) then go to work.   There is also 211.
  10. Hopefully you will have a good support network i.e. family, a significant other.
  11. If possible get yourself some entertainment like a portable DVD player so you can watch your favorite show.  Remember you don’t really want to interact with the shelter residents, this is for yourself to enjoy, but make sure you lock it up!  Remember those residents will STEAL YOUR STUFF!  So keep it secure.
  12. Try to get a gym membership that way you can shower there, I really wouldn’t recommend showering at the shelter.   You can figure out why.
  13. Ladies try to obtain a Post Office box somewhere, if possible ask a relative if you can receive your mail to save money.   One suggestion ladies DON’T get your mail at the shelter.   The shelter may LOSE it.   Your mail is too important.

This is only SOME of the things that I can think of for the moment it isn’t …how do I say this an extensive list but think of this list as a basic list for survival.   Remember steer clear of the other residents a homeless shelter environment is just not healthy I don’t care HOW nice the women seem.   One minute the women seem nice, the next the fangs are bared I know because I’ve witnessed how scary & unstable ( and they are unstable) homeless women are.   Your only there until you can get some stable form of housing whether that’s renting a room, renting a sublet or whatever your main goal is to NOT  get comfortable in that place for ANY length of time.   Your goal is to make strides in getting OUT!  Remember it ain’t a college dorm.



Published by: The Lonely Shepard

Me: I grew up in an extremely abusive & disadvantaged family environment were both parents were really immature & their relationship messy! I was abducted by my Father at age 8 abused physically, mentally, degraded by his 2nd Wife, and I didn't see my Mother again until 4 years later, I had to risk my neck + my life to run off to seek help with the local police & this was way before there was any such laws on the books for child abuse. Think on that awhile. Had learning disabilities all throughout school by the time I graduated I learned nothing, was prepared for nothing out in the World. Think on that. Joined the United States Army right out of High School only reason I did join was that at the time there was an Army recruiter right on the High School campus & he took an interest in me. So I joined. I was really in over my head. But what else could I do? I lived with a single Mom who was emotionally unstable & I had ZERO support from anyone including the school staff + administrators. The military was hard & degrading to me as a woman but I got out with an honorable discharge. More about me: A series of dead end jobs, my mind was totally a mess after I got out of the Army, still had no support not even from the Veterans admin. My journey has been a total nightmare of: trying to find out about myself, learning about myself, how to live as an adult, all with no help. Now after long , and intensive filled journey I'm trying to get back on track with my life I want to go to school with the hope of one day attending University. I don't wish my journey on anyone. No one gave me guidance: as a child as a teen as a young adult I was all on my own! and it was real lonely , isolating, extremely frightening. Family? don't really have any. Now remember everyone I'm African American & I receive little to no respect I don't even warrant a speeding car that will slow down. "The person who sang the National Anthem sang the last note so high that no could reach it! That was intentional!" Belize from Tony Kushners play Angels In America. If you've read this far I will leave my email in case you want to leave me a msg. Those that are rude will get deleted immediately. Contact:

Categories just trying to make it in a World full of hate & intolerance for people of color