I Love God Proud Of It

I Love God.  And I don’t apologize for it either.  I didn’t begin to pray until much later in life.   I’ve had a few near death experiances where I had my life flash before my eyes.

Case in point my multiple times I’ve ran away from home from age 9-12 years of age in while growing up in Los Angeles a while back I won’t say what year.   Each time I was brought back usually by LAPD with little more than slight frost bite or numbness in my feet ( L.A. temps do drop at night) and a few scratches from sleeping on the ground.   Sometimes I even squatted in abandoned buildings, someones garage, and one time someone’s vegetable garden.   The last time I ran away from the Father & his 2nd Wife I went a little farther into town although were I went I could not tell you, cause I don’t remember all the places I stopped at or went to.  Anyway some older dude approached me asking me at the tender age of 12 if I wanted a job.   I simply said “no”  I hated my life so the last thing I wanted was to go to work.   Little did I know, many years later in my life that what that scumbag was referring to was more than likely something way more dangerous.    I’ve had a shotgun waved in my face after a weekend visit with my biological Father by a crazy step dad this one was Mom’s Husband.    Faced a home invader who had a knife luckily I seemed to remain calm don’t ask me why.   Don’t know how I did it.    You know it’s funny but it seems that the particular region I live in it seems so secular even atheist.   How sad.    I certainly choose not to be, because if it wasn’t for God I just wouldn’t be here period.   I’m also now choosing to remain single.    I am also not politically correct.  Nope.  My journey is for spirituality.  I also hope to achieve that elusive goal of going to school (God willing) despite the many times I’ve changed majors.

The nice thing about being single is the freedom to live the way I want which is to serve God, help the poor.  There’s a lot of evil in this World.    I know that a lot of people say that they’ve seen it all, but I really have.   I write to live.   And that everyone is my only luxury.

Until next time from the blog of a scarred battlefield weary wounded warrior princess.  I continue to  Walk tall & demand to be treated with dignity.   Peace!

Things that really drive me crazy

It really bothers me when you:  Stand off at a distance staring at me.   I need to say that it gives me the absolute creeps!  Want to talk start by walking yourself over & introducing yourself.

It really bothers me when you:  Follow me around like some some lost puppy.  Especially when I don’t even know you.  Again YIKES creepyville.

It really bothers me when you:  Come do the door of my apartment, knock on my door and expect me to let you in.  Especially WHEN you do NOT call before hand, and I don’t even really know you !   This goes w/o saying, if you don’t know the person and the person hasn’t invited you to come over, don’t go showing up at their place of residence.  Ever.  Even when you know where they live.  It’s ignorant & just bad etiquette but most of all it makes you look so stupid.

It really bothers me when : If I only know you in a real casual way i.e. not friends, or anything else please don’t have the ridiculous expectation that while I’m deboarding the same bus, I should wait to walk with you.   This actually happened to me one year when I was headed to a 12 step meeting.   I no longer attend 12 step meetings.   Creepiest people on the planet.

Had to type this up it has bothered me for a few years after I decided to leave the 12 step program.   It’s not only 12 steppers but some people in general that seem to lack any kind of  common sense.

I Practice Gratitude Except For This One Thing

I just can’t stand the Fall & Winters in Seattle.   Although I’ve lived here for many years & I can’t even afford to move the lack of sun this time of year is awful.    I’ve taken to talking to my Doctor about getting a sun lamp through the VA.   I’ll need it.  

It’s no wonder the Pacific Northwest turns out such sullen types.   And it could be the reason that I favor shows filmed in Miami (like the cancelled show Burn Notice) and Magnum PI.

Out of all the poor choices I’ve made in my life the one I regret the most was returning to the Pacific Northwest!   I’m stuck here for now.   However the day I move not ‘if’  but when someday my new city doesn’t even have to be a sunny locale.   I just want the H*** out of this State.

So for now how I’ll keep my sanity is to work on getting that passport together for  future trips up North, where I hope to make some intelligent, nice friends.   That part has been real difficult.   I would stand a better chance at winning the Publishers Clearinghouse Sweeps.   No idea where you meet nice quality friends who aren’t gorging themselves to death with food as comfort cause the obesity rate here is off the charts!  I’m still plodding along.   First step those math classes to what I hope will be towards an A.A. degree.   Where I hope to transfer OUT of here to anywhere that isn’t the Pacific Northwest.   I don’t know how I do it!   But it sure explains why some people choose to end their lives or delve deep into drug addiction.   Lucky for me my addiction is Barq’s root beer & Little Debbie’s honey buns.   I also pray ALOT!  I’m not ashamed.   It’s whats kept me sane.   

So kids here is how to stay sane when you live in what could only be described like a constant bad scene out of a movie .   Where the majority of adults here are nothing more but little children occupying a grown up body, where the weather totally sucks your soul out through your body & family is just non existent.

1. Read lots

2. Seek refuge in good music preferably of the relaxing kind

3. Watch lots of good movies of whatever your favorite genre might be

4. Pray like there’s no tomorrow cause your life just might depend on it.  I’m not joking here.

5.  Keep busy, occupy your time

If I seem to have forgotten something?  Oh well I’ll put it in the next blog.

Until next time boys & girls.

Be good.  Stay out of trouble.

I’ve Had Many Bad Breaks. A Look Back On My Mistakes, And How I Will Get On The Right Track

Source: I’ve Had Many Bad Breaks. A Look Back On My Mistakes, And How I Will Get On The Right Track

Source: I’ve Had Many Bad Breaks. A Look Back On My Mistakes, And How I Will Get On The Right Track

I’ve Had Many Bad Breaks. A Look Back On My Mistakes, And How I Will Get On The Right Track

Source: I’ve Had Many Bad Breaks. A Look Back On My Mistakes, And How I Will Get On The Right Track

Source: I’ve Had Many Bad Breaks. A Look Back On My Mistakes, And How I Will Get On The Right Track